my husband is driving my daughter away

Be happy that your daughter has a father who wants to be involved in her life. Or its hilarious I have seriously never watched football in my life, so I once got called on to do a touchdown dance. And thats always stuck with me, and I find myself thinking about it a lot whenever theres something I dont want to do but that I know is the right thing. Maybe shell end up in the entertainment industry, or become a writer. Taking the Keys Away: What to Do If a Senior Won't Stop Driving - AgingCare And yeh I hated going to home depot with my dad but I know a lot more about home maintenance than some people. He started throwing me out at 13 for reasons like my friend being weird, my hair being weird, my music being terrible, etc. I dont know why the father doesnt like Star Trek, but shows like Eureka, Warehouse 13, and Revolution are all pretty good cross sections of fangirlyness and science. He never rolled his eyes at me or made me feel less because of what I liked. I would just like to briefly brag about my dad and how were going to this awesome music festival together this summer!!! I finally watched Firefly for the first time last night with my bf who has been begging me to watch it with him. My husband is driving me crazy over my daughters wedding He's just as cool and aloof with me these days and I'm not sure how I feel about him anymore. I must just not be seeing things clearly. Awesome show full of information. New readers, welcome to Dear Wendy, a relationship advice blog. Talk about making a little go a very long way. lets_be_honest Have you read Tumblr recently? Theyll sacrifice a perfect moment of tenderness if they feel there is the possibility of a reciprocal expectation lurking behind the scenes. How dare she share her own interests. As an only child, I didnt have to share my parents, and I just happened to love the things my dad loved. Yeah the dictating that she cant even listen to songs sometimes in the car is way over the top. He is also very critical of both of US He doesnt have to like Star Trek, but he can respectfully engage her when she talks about this topic. He should be talking to his wife about how he feels alienated when it is the three of them, but this is an issue between him and his wife. I dont care if they actually do or not, hes the adult and shes the kid here, so he needs to act like it. Its not his thing, and as an adult I respect that (now the two of us nerd out talking about law related stuff since I just got my J.D. You probably had no idea you were getting into this no-win relationship when it began. Frankly, her interests sound pretty varied to me for 12: reading, pop culture, sci-fi, archery, piano and Broadway. This is partly why it can be so challenging to get a cognitively impaired individual to stop driving. Unless its, you know, the lastest Madonna tour or album . Generally, Ive found that geeky fandoms have more respect for and interest in learning than, say, those who follow the Kardashians would. You can see it in the fighting. I feel like this could have been written by my mom, to an extent. Weird. My husband is a HUGE Firefly fanboy. This is exactly my experience, too. My husband is an OK-ish dad when he does spend time with Petunia, but I think he is very happy with his bachelorlike life, since I basically serve as a full-time cleaning lady and chef, and I. July 3, 2013, 3:16 am. However, its wife that wrote in. And so does dad. Im sure BOTH the LW ~and~ her husband could benefit from those. Hilary Duff has always come clean about her parenting journey over the years. He may feel like hes being left out or that he isnt good enough for his daughter. Another possibility is that her husband doesnt understand how to connect with his daughter on an emotional level. Being My Husbands Caregiver is Exhausting. The Inner Light, frequently hailed as one of the most poignant sci-fi television episodes of all time. I think it still disappoints him that I dont enjoy it, and havent watched it all. Seriously? If the issue is raised during a child custody . You may not see the rewards right away. Belittling her favorite things will only cause more resentment and make her even less likely to want to spend time with him. Find a common ground youve got to. Anyway, we had to go visit one of his aunts who was dying in the hospital, and my dad admitted to me that he didnt WANT to go and said he was dreading it (which was not something hed normally say to me), but that sometimes you have to do stuff you dont want to do. I would have been more open to doing different things if I wasnt told that there was something wrong or bad about the interests I did have. You dont have to love Justin Bieber and Broadway to just ask the kid why she loves it so much. And something about him wanting the daughter to be more competitive just struck me the wrong way. Then Id tell you to keep pushing for her to spend time with you. My feeling is that its closer to the first scenario, and the LW is making it seem worse than in is. How to Make a Girl Chase You Over Text After Sex, mother is at a loss as to why her husband is driving her daughter, reason is that hes trying to save his daughter, My Boyfriend And His Daughter Act Like A Couple (10 Solutions), Boost Your Friends Mood with These Short Positive Affirmations, Why Some People Are Jealous of Your Success, 110 Millionaire Affirmations to Attract Wealth, 10 Ways To Get a Busy Man to Make Time for Love, 51 Emotional Wellness Goals to Transform Your Life. I do understand how easily this Mom couldve gotten caught up in her ways of teaming up with the kid. I mean freak out and force your kid to read something if they cant, not if you dont like that they choose to read Harry Potter in their free time. However, he also needs to learn to compromise. Because your daughter may eventually outgrow her fangirl phase, but if you do your job right, shell never outgrow being a strong, confident, interesting and interested person. July 2, 2013, 11:25 am. So, so not like me. I went through an accapella phase and a disney phase and a pop punk phase, a Growing pains phase, and on and on, and he rolled his eyes and helped me set the VCR, but wasnt willing to watch it. Sure, he dragged me out on hikes that I hated, and I was a brat and pain during many of them. July 2, 2013, 3:17 pm. Its tough when you realize that your husband and daughter dont get along. She and my dad didnt have much of a relationship, so she kind of looked to me to be her BFF, and I had a lot more in common with her. July 2, 2013, 1:17 pm. He did crossword puzzles so I sat down next to him so I could learn and now we do them together. You do her a disservice by being greedy with her time and attention. I agree with Wendy here. LW, what kind of music does your husband like? Engage in any behavior that gaslights my daughter in law. We are this little team of 2. Amazing job today! Huge difference one is laughing with you, one is laughing at you and I think when your daughter is 12 and you are having trouble getting along that it is on the adult/father to go the extra mile and make sure that you arent being a jackass in an effort to be humorous. Roll your eyes!?! He still clips those articles, and even though he and I are a ways apart politically, I can always trust them to have something well-reasoned and thoughtful to say. Entirely too much. if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[120,600],'therelationshipnotes_com-mobile-leaderboard-1','ezslot_16',128,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-therelationshipnotes_com-mobile-leaderboard-1-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[120,600],'therelationshipnotes_com-mobile-leaderboard-1','ezslot_17',128,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-therelationshipnotes_com-mobile-leaderboard-1-0_1');.mobile-leaderboard-1-multi-128{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:15px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:15px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:600px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}If your daughter is still young, she may not be ready to see you with anyone other than her biological father. It sounds like your husband feels really left out and is more just reacting than being proactive about changing things. my parents made us go to church every Sunday then come home and watch meet the press. They actually like this stuff! So it was this wonderful little springboard into history for them. Thinks hes hilarious). Although Mom does need to step up and encourage a stronger relationship between the two of them, its ultimately Dads responsibility to cultivate that relationship. My father (and mother, if I want to be totally honest) would criticize anything that my sister and I had an interest in, regardless of how much value it did or did not have. These were followed up by hours and hours of This Old House, which we were required to sit through for family time but we werent allowed to speak at all during the show, lest my father miss something. lets_be_honest You dont have to worship the same pop culture icons to have solid relationships. If LWs husband is making LWs daughter think that shes less of an awesome person for not having the skills he wants her to have, instead of saying these skills will make her a more awesome person, than thats probably the main reason shes pulling away. On the other side, my sister hates sports and has ZERO in common with my dad and I would say prefers my mom to him. I cried myself to sleep. No, but we went, because thats how we spent time together- projects and DIY fixes. The point here is that Mom seems to allow her to only have interest in those things, which is bad. It was nothing but glassy-eyed stares and yawning. And your husband needs to grow the eff up and be supportive of your daughters interests. But I would say that Dad needs to try not to do the whole disparaging remarks thing. I totally get it, but shes just got to snap out of it and team up with Dad. One activity we all enjoyed!!!! She can only control her own behaviour, which is why Wendy is addressing hers and not his. But the show as a whole, awesome. My mom and I were not friends like this, and she let my dads bullying escalate to keep the peace.