It makes us feel seen, understood, and appreciated. From what I read, she falls into the category of know them well but I wonder if its not something a bit out of place. And Ill encourage them to be proud. 2. 7. Encouraging children and others to be proud of themselves is healthier. Responding to Im proud of you with gratitude has many benefits. So thank you, mom and dad! JavaScript is disabled. I thought who gave you the superiority, you seem to be giving yourself for my accomplishment My friend didnt understand. Never downplay the way you feel about someone's abilities and effort. Because this was someone elses idea. I now understand that its because I dont feel superiority over anyone, and Im perfectly happy with that . I think that the phrase really bothers me, because its like saying, Wow, I didnt think you were good enough to ever achieve -insert whatever here.- My fiance said it to me last night while I was doing the dishes. A significant share of Americans (44%) say they personally know someone who has been shot, either accidentally or intentionally. And you get to benefit from them regardless of the outcome of your relationship. They seem to make him quite happy. 8. Let me tell you why. He may not have been able to think of something better or funny so he settled for that. Especially when your best friend is saying You make me proud, they arent just complimenting you. "I wish I had met you. Similarly, if someone tries to imply a mentor relationship by telling you, Im proud of you, its like a bad parent trying to claim the rights and status of a good one. Youre my friend, not my parents! A 2017 analysis of 2012 national data from the US, showed that parent behaviour could have a protective role in a their child's mental health. It was then that I realized that who I am is a unique, valuable, and loveable person. Paul urged his young companion Timothy to be "a worker who does not need to be ashamed" (2 Timothy 2:15). Someone has just gone out of their way to say something nice to you. After reading this, I now believe its because I dont look up to him in any way and he doesnt know me so well as to fully appreciate my accomplishment like my family would. How often do we utter this common parenting phrase, in moments of pleasure at our childs latest achievement? But this seems less common. Thats why its important to take their words seriously and to respond in a meaningful way. I think you deserve the credit for this all. Connect, Converse and Communicate Better. A hug or a gentle touch of the hand can even get this message across. The truth here is, different people say and hear different things in the expression Im proud of you.. Is it wrong to be proud of your accomplishments? When I Say I'm Proud of You - ttmm.io Bless me that I keep doing bigger things than this. Yes, I'm sure you've come across "me too" in such situations, but it's very often ambiguous, or sounds arrogant. Responding to Im proud of you with gratitude can help to boost your confidence and can help you to overcome self-doubt. You have always been there for me and our friendship is something that will never go away. I really dont see that she had a direct influence in what I chose to do. How come you didnt come to watch this match? When you respond to Im proud of you with gratitude, youre reinforcing the positive behavior that you want to see in yourself and others. . It isnt. When someone knows that you are not only proud, but you are inspired and amazed, it will be an even better compliment. 03:48. One of the wives of these manual labourers had befriended me in church and was an older woman. Its probably contempt and anger. So, if youve achieved something in your educational or professional field, and someone informs you theyre proud of you, it means you did a great job there. I can see a peer, a spouse, or even a child saying that to someone who got a new deserved promotion, for instance. To try to sum this up, I mrried and ended up in a small, isolated village filled with people who either did not graduate high school or barely achieved that level of schooling. In what context. Linda Adams, in her book Be Your Best, quotes Charleszetta Waddles (African American activist): You cant give people pride, but you can provide the kind of understanding that makes people look to their inner strengths and find their own sense of pride. Well, that means theyre impressed, happy, and overjoyed with what you did, achieved, or say something. translation - How do you say "proud of you" in Chinese? - Chinese 11 Steps to Be More Proud of Yourself - Happier Human 2. Larissa Dann, a veteran trainer of Parent Effectiveness Training in Australia, suggests that we stop saying "I am proud of you," and start saying, "I am proud for you." 1 It is a subtle shift from the accomplishment being about the parent to the accomplishment being about the child. After all, you were the one who put the effort into writing the report you did the research, you put the paper together. A person receiving this praise could also feel belittled it could feel as though their achievement was unexpected - a surprise to the other person. When your partner is mad at you, your flirty responses to I hate you will certainly make them laugh. On Wednesday, a Proud Boy leader, Joseph . Yes, I agree that it can also be very strong coming from siblings and spouses/lovers. The reader alone is responsible for any action they take as a result of reading this website. Drake - Redemption Lyrics | Genius Lyrics We love all of our readers and we want to you to know how much youre appreciated! Ben Casnocha It is a darn good thing that you wrote your opinion; that I found it tonight, and that comments continue to be accepted. If you teach someone maths and they pass their exam same thing they are good because they have taken notice of your teaching. Second, this very fact helps explain why we resent it if the praise comes from someone who isnt viewed as a mentor. 49 Best Responses To "I Am Proud Of You" (From Family And Friends) When someone tells you that they are proud of you, not only are they impressed by something you did and who you are, but they also want others to know it. Proud Boys celebrate after Trump's debate callout - NBC News My mother said it to me when I graduated from college and I will never forget it. I'm so much proud of you for completing your graduation and wish you will succeed in every . I dont think that without your support I can make it. But I believe that spouses say it, and siblings. Disclaimer: The articles, blogs, testimonials and P.E.T. In other words, I care so much about the other person, that their accomplishment can evoke pride in ME. 3. 2. But one doesn't want to say that they're not proud of their country if they're looking to lead it. John decides to replicate his painting (for the reward of praise, not for his own sense of improvement and competence), and looks up at his mother with rapturous expectation. You know that I'm bound to see you. Here subject and object are the same person. They know I mean: I am so impressed by what you did, and proud to be able to call myself your mother. If I said this to a friend it would mean the same thing. Congratulations to our dearest son. I knew it, if no one was going to like this. Try these new and funny excuses to ask for money from your parents or your family. #8: They say you need to change. Initially this sit didnt sit well with me. Id opt for saying, Im happy for you. 15. 10 Ways to Let Your Husband Know You're Proud of Him I was damned proud of her for overcoming this setback and told her so. Your friend wants to say "I am proud of you too, my friend". 20 Other Ways to Say "I'm Proud of You" with Sincerity I just graduated with my degree in hospitality." "Oh, a future barista," says the other guest, swirling his drink. Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window), Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window), Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window), Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window). So you better know in which tone theyre saying so. When you respond to Im proud of you with gratitude, youre also taking advantage of the power of positive reinforcement. What would replace this oh-so-common parenting expression? you see the work of your close friend and you tell him "I am proud of you". I agree that its a phrase that is really reserved for the individual doing, or accomplishing something, i.e. by Carolyn Steber. Why are you taking the credit for my effort? (I'd prefer "Congratulations! When someone says they are busy, it could mean that they are busy. True - the parent might have spent hours helping the child get their homework done or even completing the childs assignment. I was irritated by that remark. thats a case of someone doing one-upmanship. A compliment like this means a lot to us, seeing that we give our people a chance to be happy and proud because of us. Tell me something else, Ive heard this at home. 4. "Well," you respond with enthusiasm, "I'm so excited right now. 3. Sometimes people use it to appropriate the achievements of others, which is a sad and awful thing. "I know you have a lot going on . I guess after receiving the compliment, I felt that he was patronizing me, because I have only had my parents or teachers say they were proud of me. Try The Behaviour Window. An acquaintance commented on a recent Facebook post I made that he was proud of me and immediately I felt so mad about that but couldnt figure out why. Later, I saw her in a restaurant and apologized for balling her out in public. "I'm proud of you" is often associated with mentor-mentee relationships, something that a teacher or parent might say. Because of this, it might feel awkward to say "I'm proud of you" to a friend or colleague, even if you mean it. Is it a parent speaking to a child, for instance, or a friend to a friend? 14. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. Listen to your inner wisdom, and make a note of the meaning that resonates with you. Thank you. That is why a long-term mentor can also feel pride. If you had a hand in that success then I think it is ok to say, I am so proud of you as it does imply that the speaker played a part. 6. Better Responses 2023. In the South, people are proud of you if they know you. For even more than mentors, but for people who deserve your care and attention in life. Taking a few deep breaths can help you focus. . A strong argument is a solid one. For Stein, the worst compliment is hearing: "You've lost soooo much weight! Set realistic goals. I thought to myself, who is she to be proud of me? The effect of this praise might be opposite to the aim of the parent. Just let them be. Especially when you get to hear this from your parents, it means theyre happy to see, 43 Motivational Messages For Hard Working Boyfriend, funny excuses to ask for money from your parents, How to tell your parents that you have a girlfriend, 9 Best Answers To How Was Your Interview?, 16 Clever Comebacks When Someone Tells You To Grow Up, 18 Best Responses To Backhanded Compliments On Social Media. Don't disguise it as concern, either. So happy for us! http://pbskids.org/rogers/songLyricsImProudOfYou.html. "A proud man is always looking down on things and people; and, of course, as long as you are looking down, you cannot see something that is above you." - C.S Lewis 2. Im proud of myself, too. You are using an out of date browser. "I know how you feel". If you're more than a friend it's more loving. I dont care that I had to hear it from a video-taped personage. When you respond to Im proud of you with gratitude, youre showing that you value the words of the person expressing their admiration and respect for you. She states I always tell someone I am proud of them. Overall, its reserved for people who you trust and respect. Especially when you get to hear this from your parents, it means they're happy to see you grow up the way they raised you. They mean the exact opposite of what you think. Some years ago I attended a parenting seminar, where the speaker incidentally mentioned avoiding the phrase "Im proud of you". The important piece is if they are genuine in their caring (and have been consistent, contrary to the parent that was never there but then feels pride). This topic came to mind because I recently saw a friend / mentor and told him about a meaningful professional accomplishment. And, here are the respectful replies to respond with: 1. 1. Ive been lurching between How can you be proud of someone elses children? but then challenging that with But then as we do both have a close relationship with her we probably have had some influence on how shes turning out . Let them know you think it's great they're considering quitting and that you're ready to help. Sometimes a simple change of scenery might help you to stop thinking negative thoughts. When someone says "I'm proud of you", they are expressing their admiration and respect for you - and that can be a powerful thing. First, there's physical attraction. If its a long-term relationship, the mentor will genuinely care. Your email address will not be published. What do they perceive - when a parent (or teacher) says "Im proud of you"? I was actually kicked out of my house at 16 by her and her new husband and had financial trouble during my years in school that she had contributed to, how in the hell can she be proud of me when all she did was hinder me? It seems to me that the authors of the study used the phrase 'I'm proud of you' as a catch-all measurement, to reflect a parent's emotional connection with, and support, for, their child - and that it was this emotional involvement that provided protection against suicidal ideation. You are happy they are an ambassador for you. Your email address will not be published. Rather than the child feeling respected for their efforts, they may feel patronised, put-down. The parent might have paid a lot of money, or given up time, to coach and practice tennis with their winning child. I drove home and when I got home I texted her that I had arrived home safely. Thank you so much for this great compliment. Ji on Twitter: "If u ate only when someone says they're proud of u That proud phrase didnt bother me at first, but the more I thought about it, the more I began to wonder, what does she mean when she says shes proud of me? Probably no big deal but would be interested in input from others especially other females. This is what makes the difference in whether the receiver feels great or resentful. The proud feeling transcends from child to parent. Thank you for starting this. How to accept a compliment (without sounding like a douche) Its 10 years later, and I hope that, by now, you have told your children, if you mean it, that you are proud of them. On the one hand, you're thinking, "He says I'm amazing," and you know he's not wrong. If He Says These 10 Things, He's Just Stringing You Along Until He Lovers often feel proud when they see their beloved in action. And they both say that you're over and done with me. For me, this was a huge take-away moment. 1. said Christopher Robin. Make sure to take the time to think about how you want to respond. I was talking about this statement Im Proud of you to a friend.I was annoyed about someone saying they were proud of me who barley knows me. Darling, Are You Proud of Me? | Psychology Today . But, its important to remember that responding to Im proud of you with gratitude can help to boost your confidence and will help you to overcome your self-doubt. A: It's not necessarily wrong to take pride in our work, of course; if we don't, our work will probably end up sloppy or incomplete. How to Tell Someone You Are Proud Of Them Quotes(Top 18) - Mind Blood But, when you want to make your responses more effective and special, these are some good ways to do it. Benjamin Franklin Positive, Forgiveness, Respect 985 Copy quote "You make me so mad.". I had an experience where a friend, who I consider in every way my equal, noticed that I made a healthy food choice (not that I didnt before, but I think its the first time he noticed) and he said, Oh Im so proud of you!. 1. relationship advice marriage advice Women love advice. Why You Shouldn't Say "I'm So Proud of You" - Alyson Schafer But this will be seen as an overreaction. Also, I really like the litmus test of how you would feel on the receiving end. They can be proud; we should be happy for them, and grateful that we played any part in it. What are we trying to say or do, when we innocently, and with the best of intentions, praise our children with "Im proud of you"? . The 9 Best Things to Say to Someone Who's Lost Weight - Life by Daily Burn The "I'm Proud of You" Litmus Test - Ben Casnocha Keep believing in me, I will make you proud more and more. Proverbs 16:18 Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before stumbling. A Summer Like No Other - Bushfires, Fear, Famly, Hope and Change, Preparing To Say Goodbye Even As I Hug Hello, When I Realised That Being A Parent To An Adult Is Different To Being A Parent Of A Child, Setting Limits Sets Limits On Children Learning to Discipline Themselves, Learning to Take The Back Seat As A Parent, As My Child Moves To Adulthood, Am I Treasuring The Moments? Can "me too" be used here? Lost Index. My husband just said it to me a couple of days ago (for a little achievement I just made in my physique) and it made me happy as well. . When you say, "I'm proud of you," you may actually be simply rejoicing in another. "), Parent: "Im proud that you got all As in your school report/won that tennis trophy", How might you feel as the child? 5. By accepting the compliment and reflecting on your qualities, you may feel more satisfied in life. Yeah, If grandpa was here, he would have said the same. Get your facts straight. I believe you. At the same time, the paper stated that "a key is to ensure that children feel positively connected to their parents and family," and that parents needed to demonstrate to their children that "they cared about them", that they "had their back". Luke 18:9-14 ESV / 5 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful PJ, I think your ex still cares for you so your accomplishments evoke pride in her. Sajeev Rajan Glad that I keep our family tradition alive. Updated 7th September 2016; and 19th April 2019. Who is saying this to whom? As if Im mentally retarded and reading a book for the first time in my life, and hoping to get a cookie and a star sticker. 11. I didnt expect that this would mean so much for us. The administrator takes no responsibility for any action or outcome a reader may make as a result of reading a post. 25 EPIC Bible Verses About Pride And Humility (Proud Heart) Maybe Im mad, because it makes me feel like he thinks I wasnt doing enough before I started back at work- like carrying children inside of my body for nearly two years, plus birthing them, plus never sleeping, plus cleaning for HOURS upon HOURS everyday, plus cooking, plus plus plus wasnt enough to be proud of. But I would also add another category: people who know you well *because* they have worked with you and even for you for a long time. The next morning, I woke up to an email in my inbox that was one line: "I'm really proud of you." Here are some examples of what you shouldn't say to someone on their sober anniversary. Why I Stopped Saying "I'm Proud of You" - My Give On Things Thank you., Im honored that youre proud of me. Gun owners are more likely than non-gun owners to know someone who has been shot (51% vs. 40% of non-owners).
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